hi evelyn. glad you liked it. i felt it was all coming out cliché really with the language but i tried to keep it consistent... and also most of the names and so on are actually Finnish translations (ahem)
there isnt a second part. i was so far over 2500 words i stopped where it was as i thought it would be easy for readers to fathom the ending from the clues in the last lines.
the images were off Bing image generator. that took ages! the prompt was something like "a fantasy character a cross between an elf and a red panda with big eyes dressed in linen and leather holds a scroll in a dark library with hundreds of scrolls of shelves"
everything looked too much like a red panda haha! and i couldt get a tail in the image it kept saying the images conatined forbidden content every time i included a tail... weird!
I think this saliva and tail censorship palaver is down to the shapeshifting fantasists at the spicier end of the romantasy shelf. Takes all sorts when it comes to werewolves and dragons and Amazon etc take strong exception to any overt bestial tropes. I guess that also includes images.
of course, now I REALLY want to know what those images were that it generated, and then self censored - its hilarous really - like "WOOPS - silly me! I've only gone and generated some Pornography! - how rude of me!- sorry, im afraid you cant see that, try again"
That was great! - really fast-paced and immersive. And chock-full of lovely fantasy language. Is there going to be a part two? You ended it on something of a cliffhanger...
I love those images btw - did you get the GIG (Great Image Generator - yes, the one in the sky) to do it? Obviously I especially love the second one - how did you instruct the GIG to produce that kind of creature/intelligent foxy feline-esque girl?
and I have reworked the last image... i couldnt get it to do an image with saliva ... forbidden content identified???? so i had to go with drool... and eventually i got something more like i imagined the grave digger... which is named using the finnish for gravedigger !
Didn't realise! What the Dickens! You are a bumbling fool Mister Winney! What are you? Yes, a bumbling fool! I shall be docking your wages accordingly Mister Winney. Mark my words I shall! And may I say, Mister Winney, that if you persist in such bumbling folly then I shall see to it, I shall, that your Christmas goose is well and truly cooked!!
well done you! that was a great slice of imagination that one. im not sure why i didnt clock that i had a mention. i am in a tricky spot because there are quite a few people I really like to read but i really cant afford to pay subscribe to all of them... it have to give up my gym or something to justify it as well as the writing club im sort of attached to... i might leave that although they are such a delightful gang and i enjoy dropping horror bombs into the story telling almost every month. this month the prompt is horror so i have to excel....
I know what you mean about paid subscriptions - I simply can’t afford any at the moment, and I am mindful of the fact that the same is true for a lot of other people, which may go some way to explaining why I haven’t gotten any paid subscribers yet. Well, we live in hope.
This is awesome! I really enjoyed how fast-paced it was and how quickly everything happened - it felt completely action packed! And I love that the lichen revealed the truth!!
I really wasn't expecting the attack at the end - really knocked me for 6, but in the best possible way :)
This was quite an enjoyable read, Nick! I was not expecting the mole-like creature, and I was wondering how you were going to finish it off with only a few paragraphs left. Now reading the comments, I see that this is part of a longer story. Interested to see how it ends!
I enjoyed this Lilluputian style tale. It certainly rattled along, with a cornucopia of characters and lore. Yet you managed to stitch the scenes together in a coherent manner, still frame the hero's quest, and give us an understandable cliffhanger. Excellent stuff!
thanks jonathan. really appreciate the feedback and glad you enjoyed it. ill repost it innits fuller version at some point and put back the 1500 words i slashed out of it haha!
thank you leanne - glad you liked it - that is actually a heavily redacted piece - about 40% of the original story was cut to put it into 2500 words - so it is a bit of a gallop... im going to repost it with the ending actually on it as well - and all from one joking comment about "moon parsnips" a few weeks ago.
brian explained to me - a bear of little brain, you see - that you dont have to put a limit on it, unless you want your work to go to the discussion bit later - I still dont really understand but hey ho - anyway I will repost it in the full version in a while, and I will add the ending to it - i was pleased I managed to keep most of the key parts despite axing about 1500 words out of it (boo hoo)
The strange names made it difficult reading for me, but also gave it an epic fantasy feel. At the end, I wasn't sure what she meant to do with the sap. I assumed the idea was to get the beast to drink it, or maybe chew the roots and get the sap that way. I would have liked it made clearer. Nevertheless, it is an excellent story.
hi Virginia. all the weird words are actually Finnish which i got from using google translate. i mistakenly applied a word limit to the piece because i didnt follow the rules properly...so i didnt have space to finish it off. but essentially yes the finale in mind was that Orava nips down the tunnels and fills a skin with sap and then she and noita drop it down the gravediggers breathing holes or something like that anyway.
Hi Garen. thank you for reading and giving feedback! the word count was a self imposed problem. im going to post the fuller version soon with the 1500 odd words i cut out and an actual ending ... still not 100% sure until i start writing how the end will play out...
hi evelyn. glad you liked it. i felt it was all coming out cliché really with the language but i tried to keep it consistent... and also most of the names and so on are actually Finnish translations (ahem)
there isnt a second part. i was so far over 2500 words i stopped where it was as i thought it would be easy for readers to fathom the ending from the clues in the last lines.
the images were off Bing image generator. that took ages! the prompt was something like "a fantasy character a cross between an elf and a red panda with big eyes dressed in linen and leather holds a scroll in a dark library with hundreds of scrolls of shelves"
everything looked too much like a red panda haha! and i couldt get a tail in the image it kept saying the images conatined forbidden content every time i included a tail... weird!
I think this saliva and tail censorship palaver is down to the shapeshifting fantasists at the spicier end of the romantasy shelf. Takes all sorts when it comes to werewolves and dragons and Amazon etc take strong exception to any overt bestial tropes. I guess that also includes images.
Image generators are nutty. Fancy not permitting tails or saliva...
of course, now I REALLY want to know what those images were that it generated, and then self censored - its hilarous really - like "WOOPS - silly me! I've only gone and generated some Pornography! - how rude of me!- sorry, im afraid you cant see that, try again"
That was great! - really fast-paced and immersive. And chock-full of lovely fantasy language. Is there going to be a part two? You ended it on something of a cliffhanger...
I love those images btw - did you get the GIG (Great Image Generator - yes, the one in the sky) to do it? Obviously I especially love the second one - how did you instruct the GIG to produce that kind of creature/intelligent foxy feline-esque girl?
and I have reworked the last image... i couldnt get it to do an image with saliva ... forbidden content identified???? so i had to go with drool... and eventually i got something more like i imagined the grave digger... which is named using the finnish for gravedigger !
Forgot to say - congrats on your Top in Fiction for this one, Nick! Are you going to be displaying your medallion anytime soon?
did i get a mention in TIF? i didnt realise.... and i havent even finished it properly...will have to have a look!
I'm in TiF#13 btw, forgot to say - Ciao Seti seems to be going down really well - I must do more of this kind of thing.
Didn't realise! What the Dickens! You are a bumbling fool Mister Winney! What are you? Yes, a bumbling fool! I shall be docking your wages accordingly Mister Winney. Mark my words I shall! And may I say, Mister Winney, that if you persist in such bumbling folly then I shall see to it, I shall, that your Christmas goose is well and truly cooked!!
You're in TiF#12, Nick - here's the link: https://www.topinfiction.com/p/top-in-fiction-week-12
well done you! that was a great slice of imagination that one. im not sure why i didnt clock that i had a mention. i am in a tricky spot because there are quite a few people I really like to read but i really cant afford to pay subscribe to all of them... it have to give up my gym or something to justify it as well as the writing club im sort of attached to... i might leave that although they are such a delightful gang and i enjoy dropping horror bombs into the story telling almost every month. this month the prompt is horror so i have to excel....
I know what you mean about paid subscriptions - I simply can’t afford any at the moment, and I am mindful of the fact that the same is true for a lot of other people, which may go some way to explaining why I haven’t gotten any paid subscribers yet. Well, we live in hope.
The language was easily my favourite part of this. Lots of fun. You did a great job, Nick. Sorry it took me so long to finally leave a comment!
no problem Hanna. glad you liked it! it was fun to write... will finish it off properly soon
This is awesome! I really enjoyed how fast-paced it was and how quickly everything happened - it felt completely action packed! And I love that the lichen revealed the truth!!
I really wasn't expecting the attack at the end - really knocked me for 6, but in the best possible way :)
This was quite an enjoyable read, Nick! I was not expecting the mole-like creature, and I was wondering how you were going to finish it off with only a few paragraphs left. Now reading the comments, I see that this is part of a longer story. Interested to see how it ends!
I enjoyed this Lilluputian style tale. It certainly rattled along, with a cornucopia of characters and lore. Yet you managed to stitch the scenes together in a coherent manner, still frame the hero's quest, and give us an understandable cliffhanger. Excellent stuff!
thanks jonathan. really appreciate the feedback and glad you enjoyed it. ill repost it innits fuller version at some point and put back the 1500 words i slashed out of it haha!
For someone who doesn’t write fantasy, this was great and well-imagined and not that tropey at all!
thank you leanne - glad you liked it - that is actually a heavily redacted piece - about 40% of the original story was cut to put it into 2500 words - so it is a bit of a gallop... im going to repost it with the ending actually on it as well - and all from one joking comment about "moon parsnips" a few weeks ago.
Would love to see the full version! The 2500 words is hard. I just squeaked in myself.
brian explained to me - a bear of little brain, you see - that you dont have to put a limit on it, unless you want your work to go to the discussion bit later - I still dont really understand but hey ho - anyway I will repost it in the full version in a while, and I will add the ending to it - i was pleased I managed to keep most of the key parts despite axing about 1500 words out of it (boo hoo)
I liked the challenge of the word limit… otherwise I’d go on for days…
i hear you!
The strange names made it difficult reading for me, but also gave it an epic fantasy feel. At the end, I wasn't sure what she meant to do with the sap. I assumed the idea was to get the beast to drink it, or maybe chew the roots and get the sap that way. I would have liked it made clearer. Nevertheless, it is an excellent story.
sorry...Virginia! i'm always doing that!
hi Virginia. all the weird words are actually Finnish which i got from using google translate. i mistakenly applied a word limit to the piece because i didnt follow the rules properly...so i didnt have space to finish it off. but essentially yes the finale in mind was that Orava nips down the tunnels and fills a skin with sap and then she and noita drop it down the gravediggers breathing holes or something like that anyway.
You could always expand it.
Hi Garen. thank you for reading and giving feedback! the word count was a self imposed problem. im going to post the fuller version soon with the 1500 odd words i cut out and an actual ending ... still not 100% sure until i start writing how the end will play out...